Born in Ethiopia, raised in Sweden. He and his sister were orphans in Ethiopia and were adopted by a Swedish couple. He is just so yummy. A man after my own heart, not only really attractive, but can cook.
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Life sucks period. I don't know why I would want to continue it but there's this annoying resiliency within me that won't allow me to give up and I'm grateful, I suppose. There's hope in my heart, to see past the negative and focus on the positive. I'm trying. I focus so much on my failings that I don't see my successes. I've decided to see a therapist. One of my co-workers had success with her therapist so I asked her to give me her therapist's number. I need to unlock whatever it is within me that causing all of this. I want to be whole. I want to be better. Not jagged pieces with no purpose.
I had a revelation this morning. They seem to come as a result of some folly of mine. Be that as it may, I'm grateful for this revelation. I know why I have so many failed relationships. I just choose anyone. I choose whoever pays me attention. I know from the onset that they are not what I want or what I need, but I overlook all of that because they pay me attention and they happen to be in my space. I don't get approached by men. It could be a multitude of reasons why that doesn't happen, but men don't approach me. So when one does, even if he is not what I'd be attracted to, the mere fact that he showed interest in me, meant that I had to give in. I give in because I don't know when next I'll get approached again.
I learned about the concept of loving myself and being comfortable with being alone. I learned it but I didn't know how to put it into practice. I didn't know how to go about executing it in order for it to have the necess…
My dad called me tonight. My sister had given me a head's up that he would call but it had gone in one ear and out the other. My dad called. I heard his voice and I remembered him. In that less than six minute conversation, I listened to my father speaking and I remembered him. My sister told me that dad wanted to make amends with his family, the family he had cast aside and forgotten about. She told me that I should forgive and forget but allow him to know how much hurt he caused. I had no problem wanting to do that but when it came down to it, I didn't. I cried. I choked up during our conversation and tears slid down my face. And just as quickly as he called, he disconnected. He asked for my forgiveness and asked about my son. He said that he'll call back and we'll chat again and then maybe then I'll share with him all that I've felt.