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Showing posts from September, 2011

Hollow

That is exactly how I feel when I have a casual encounter.  At the time, my body yearns for it, but afterwards, when I'm walking back to my car to get home or to my various destinations, I realized that for the moment, it satisfied my carnal desire but left me wanting for a more substantial situation.

I haven't wanted a real relationship in so long, so imagine my surprise that I long for it.  I'm looking for love, looking for companionship, looking for not just a temporary situation, but a relationship.

It's taken me close to six years to be at the point where I want to have someone around on  a daily basis, someone I can trust w/ all my good and bad and not worry that this person is going to expose me to the world.  My ex husband did that.  All the good and bad, mainly bad, about me, he broadcast to the world and let them know who I am, in my most private space.

After the end of my relationship w/ Munchkin's dad, I found it really hard to trust any man.  I had b…

It's just sex

I get it now, when a man, who is either in a committed relationship or married, has sex w/ another woman and says that it's just sex.  I get it now.  I'm watching the story of Jacqueline Kennedy, in her own words, and there's a scene where President Kennedy removes a stray hair from her face, I see such tenderness in that display and see that he loves her so much, but he was a man and had needs.  I get it now.  It doesn't mean I like it or would ever condone it, but I get it.
When it boils down to it, all I want is a nice guy.  He may be rich, poor, preferably employed, but still a nice guy.  Someone kind, takes my feelings into consideration.  Working for a dating service, I talk to people everyday and find out what they're looking for and it makes me wonder what I want from someone.  I'm now getting to know someone and he seems very nice.  From the get go, he was nice and continues to be nice and it doesn't hurt that he's very attractive as well.  Mind you, I've had my share of situations and in the end, I look for kindness.  Kindness, sense of humor, understanding.  you have that, you're on the right track.