Life sucks period. I don't know why I would want to continue it but there's this annoying resiliency within me that won't allow me to give up and I'm grateful, I suppose. There's hope in my heart, to see past the negative and focus on the positive. I'm trying. I focus so much on my failings that I don't see my successes. I've decided to see a therapist. One of my co-workers had success with her therapist so I asked her to give me her therapist's number. I need to unlock whatever it is within me that causing all of this. I want to be whole. I want to be better. Not jagged pieces with no purpose.
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Setting my heart free
I'm going through a divorce and ending a marriage that lasted two years. Two long, hard and hurtful years. I married a monster, an evil man. When I say evil, I mean evil like when we were kids and we had to have on night lights because we were afraid of the boogeyman. That kind of evil. A man free of any sort of remorse. A man with no conscience. More on this character later. Trust me, I will totally spill the beans but things have to be in place first. Anyway, when my marriage first ended, I was of the mind that I was free and I could move on and find the one for me, the one to truly love me the way I'd always known I'd be loved, my soulmate. Needless to say, I'm still single. Sure there are men out there who are interested but the problem is, I'm not. I'm afraid. I'm afraid of giving away my heart. I'm afraid of trusting someone so completely and utterly. I'm afraid of being myself. With my soon to be ex-husband, I trusted him impli...
Today is my off day from both work and school and i pretty much stayed up all night, watching tv and now blogging. I'm a bag of mixed emotions because of the mayhem going on in my mother's house and the fact that i'm back w/ my ex boyfriend, I'm very happy about that. CG is totally out of the picture, the twat, but for the most part, I'm doing ok. I have God on my side. Truly, psalm 27 is really coming in handy during these trying times. V10: my mother and father may abandon me but the Lord will take care of me. I love the Lord and He has truly heard my cry. God is good. CG Well, last Saturday, i drove CG to the airport before going into work. I'd already been having my misgivings about him but I just shook them off. So, Saturday night he lands in NY. He first sent me a text to let me know he'd gotten there safely earlier in the day. He later called me to chat but my sister, cousin and i were driving to ...
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