Unexpected Event
April 25th, 2012 - I miscarried on this day. I was about 7-8 weeks pregnant with my baby, whom I presumed was a girl. She would have been the first of many children that my boyfriend, the love of my life, Alex and I, would have had. She was a miracle for him, because he thought he was incapable of having children and she brought joy to me.
January 15th, 2012 - On this day, I fully committed to Alex. I finally got it. I finally understood that all the things I was chasing were foolish and had finally found the one person I wanted to be with. Not just be with but to be around. I've thought about how I feel about this man and have decided that I'd rather be unhappy with him than deliriously happy with anyone, that's how much I love him. Love is not even enough to convey my feelings for this man. The Saturday before the 15th, I questioned why it was I hadn't gotten my soul mate because apparently everyone else had theirs and I was wondering where mine was and the greatest joke of all, he was right there all along. God had given me my soul mate when I was 15 years old, had reunited me with him when I was 32 years old and I toyed around with him, fucked him in the head, dropped him more times than I can count but brought me back to him when I was 36 years old. Talk about a hard headed, pain in the ass, that is/was me.
More to come, just for whatever reason wanted to bang this thought out. I need to get back to writing. And, I missed my folks.
January 15th, 2012 - On this day, I fully committed to Alex. I finally got it. I finally understood that all the things I was chasing were foolish and had finally found the one person I wanted to be with. Not just be with but to be around. I've thought about how I feel about this man and have decided that I'd rather be unhappy with him than deliriously happy with anyone, that's how much I love him. Love is not even enough to convey my feelings for this man. The Saturday before the 15th, I questioned why it was I hadn't gotten my soul mate because apparently everyone else had theirs and I was wondering where mine was and the greatest joke of all, he was right there all along. God had given me my soul mate when I was 15 years old, had reunited me with him when I was 32 years old and I toyed around with him, fucked him in the head, dropped him more times than I can count but brought me back to him when I was 36 years old. Talk about a hard headed, pain in the ass, that is/was me.
More to come, just for whatever reason wanted to bang this thought out. I need to get back to writing. And, I missed my folks.
Comments
Glad you are much better and back!
Where have I been?