The idea of being unfaithful

I've toyed with the idea of seeing someone else. Sort of the idea of things looking better over the fence. But the thing is that I'm devoted to my love and don't want anyone but him. It boils down really to the fact that we have such history and he knew me when I was so young and knows me now. Sometimes, it's scary how he can read me and know what's going on in my head. He knows my mannerisms, knows my facial expressions.

I see other men who are taller and leaner than my beau and I do wonder what it would be like to date them or get to know them but then, I know in my heart of hearts that I wouldn't have anything substantial with them, it would be purely physical and I'm past that point. I want substance and that is what I have with my love. I have something REAL with him. If I were to step out of our relationship to satisfy a primal desire, i.e. sex that lasts a long time, that's fulfilling, the way it used to be with my love, then I would satisfy that physical yearning but it would be hollow.

Despite the fact that our sex life isn't as earth shattering as it once was, we still enjoy each other's company. We talk and share and just enjoy each other. BUT, in the long run, is that enough? Can I/we be satisfied with that sort of relationship? And that's where having an affair comes in.

I believe that affairs occur because something is lacking. The person that decides to step out of the confines of their relationship does so to fulfill a need, to complete something within them that's incomplete, i.e. sex.

I don't know. That may be true or not but I know I have those urges and I know that there is an area that is sorely lacking. The question begs, would it be worth it?

Comments

Sugarking said…
"I believe that affairs occur because something is lacking. The person that decides to step out of the confines of their relationship does so to fulfill a need, to complete something within them that's incomplete, i.e. sex. " - Deeeeeeep!!!!!
I do agree with you about something lacking, but you know it won't be worth it so there's no point in me trying to talk you off the cliff.I just started my blog because I desperately need to be able to speak freely anyway I kind of have the same situation except you're better off as you used to receive "multiple orgasms" to begin with lol....This situation is a damned if you do damned if you don't situation, because you CANT tell him...if he gets tired during sex how about oral sex(sorry if that's nasty to anyone) where ur on top so he's not doing too much...if you want him to have energy tell him u want him to exercise with "you" because alone u won't have the motivation, even if it's just wii fit(gotta start somewhere)...I think at some point everyone wonders what it'll be like with another..then I think if he left would it be worth it? that wakes me up real quick lol

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