Heart strings

My boyfriend has this theory that each of us has thousands and thousands of heart strings and they get broken now and again for different reasons. He says, some are to be expected whether it be through disappointment or things of that nature, unintentional snapping of the strings. Those are not fatal and will not hurt you too much. But, there are those things, situations, events, occurrences that when they break your heart strings, depending on how many strings are broken, can hurt and take a while to recover.

Our conversation about said heart strings revolved around a male/female relationship (i.e. marriage, boyfriend/girlfriend). He stated that the person that you're with will break some heart strings, unintentionally. But, when they intentionally break your heart strings, they have a certain number of chances before you cut them loose.

That brings me FINALLY to the intention of this blog and it's a question, but first, let me prepare the scenario: My love and I were having a discussion and I didn't like how it turned out so I pouted and sulked. When we parted, I refused to kiss him or tell him I loved him. I just wanted to be left alone to bathe in my sadness. I wanted to feel it all in my toes and squirm in it. I drove off and thought about why I was so upset. In the past, I wouldn't care about the other person's feelings, only mine mattered. But in this relationship, it's different. I wondered if my being upset was justified and really thought about what made me upset. Through rationalizing the whole thing, I knew that I had taken things a bit too far. I called him, even before I got home, to apologize. He wasn't upset, he was too calm, which prompted me to ask him what was up. He told me that his deal is that when one partner is upset, the other has to be calm. You can't have two people upset, you get no where. Makes sense. Note: Need to work on that and remember that.

I felt so guilty because I don't know how many heart strings I broke. Although he was calm, he was hurt. He's human, of course he'd be hurt, who wouldn't be? So now, I'm racked with guilt because I hurt this man, whom I love more than even I realize, and I want to make a change. So, back to the question: The aforementioned behaviour, is it normal? Is it a woman thing, human thing or Nigerian thing?

I don't' know, but, what I DO know is that I don't like. It's a waste of time and energy. I could've been canoodling with my baby but instead, I went home, alone. Another lesson learned. I guess I'll be kept in check because I now know that heart strings are at stake and I don't want to break any more of his.


蓝月 said…
maybe it's a scorpio thing.

i realised i do it as well. which is weird, i dont really do this in my previous relationship. but this one, he gives in too much to me. i think subconsciously, i'm taking advantage of it.
Anonymous said…
your bf sounds really smart
YankeeNaija said…
He is really smart. I know I've always done this, in all my relationships, but this is the first time I don't want to do it anymore. I love this man enough to break this bad habit and deal with issues with him, instead of keeping things bottled up.
ah, a couple that had been married for over 50 years told me that the key to their marriage was that when one was upset, the other wasn't. I have applied that philosophy as much as I can.

Check out My Thoughts On Marriage. Even though you guys are only dating, these could be helpful and you could drop some knowledge as well.

Take care and have a fab weekend!

NaijaScorpio said…
I guess you learn to be better and do better everything. He sounds like such a sweet person.
Anonymous said…
*clears eyes* how come am the only one who realised what the question is?

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